It Has Been A While

I've been avoiding writing for a while now. Mainly because I feel like I'm stuck in this limbo where things aren't quite happening. On Saturday I phoned my mobile broadband provider, upgraded my package and signed up for a new netbook in the hope that it might get me writing again. I've also had some great ideas for the Puffin competition which I would like to use. So, hopefully once my dizzy head and nausea disappears its back to writing.

I guess I also need to drag myself away from the Supernatural box sets that I have been watching way too much of. I had to stop after Season Three because it started to walk dangerously close to blasphemy, but the first three Seasons were mine and my sister's favourite. Sam and Dean were so like us, their childishness, their devotion to each other. It read like a guide to every sibling relationship that is really close and I miss watching that.

Weekends

Weekends always feel like you did nothing and at the same time like you never stopped. They are my down time, I watch DVDs, eat far too much and forget that I'm ill. This weekend I had a terrible headache all weekend and pain in my hip, its weird how at weekends you push through it whereas during the week you feel like you should just stop. Surely it should be the other way around.

My favourite time is the hour or so I get in Starbucks every morning to work on my edits. They are going slowly at the moment. I'm not rushing anything but it feels like I'm working harder on them than I ever had. I think I'm in this haunting period. Rewriting feels like that sometimes, you aren't working on anything new but going over old ground and mending the mistakes. It feels good though and have been getting some new ideas.

I'm determined to write something about mental illness. My sister has been suffering with severe clinical depression for years and seeing her change from the person I knew before to this shell that can't function needs to be documented and appreciated somehow. I get glimpses of the old person now and again before she collapses inward again. This affects so many people and it needs to be appreciated and understood. I have a title and an idea, now I just need a protagonist who can do it justice.